The 23 of January was a turning point for me. A woman shadowed me as a possible temp for me when I am sick. She started by being late, I waited for her though it made my morning very rushed and stressful. The first thing she says to me, after excuses for being late, is “oh, you are pregnant.” As it so happens, I am one of about nine women between the ages of 29 and 39 in Stockholm who are not pregnant. This day got better and better and by the time it was over I was almost homicidal. But thanks to this woman, I am rediscovering parts of me I haven’t seen in awhile. Like my collarbone.  And I will actually be able to appear in a bikini on Swedish beaches this summer.

A couple weeks ago I had my first no-tears jeans shopping in probably 4 years. It started at JC Sergels—which I know better. The dressing room is saturated by the tantalizing aroma of the next door bakeries delicious cinnamon buns. Torture while examining one’s own buns in a jeans. I moved on to one of the best jeans stores and most customer minded stores in Sweden—Solo at Norrmalm’s square. When I moved towards the dressing room I saw a women built kind of like me trying on this great pair of jeans. Had to be all un-Swedish and tell her she looked really great and ask her what model jeans they were. Cute Viking salesman went and got them in my size. What I thought was my size. They were too big. So I tried a size smaller. Still too big! So he went for the size smaller, but alas, they were out of that size. So I obsessed for a good while over a couple other pair of jeans that cute Viking salesman brought me. 

Then cute Viking salesman #2 came with the size smaller than the size I wanted in the Perfect Jeans. I laughed at him. No way I can squeeze into them. He smiled and left them with me anyway. Okay, fine. Calves, in, thighs, in, butt, in, button after button…..Okay did I say a no tears? I think I may have shed tears of joy here! I buttoned on a pair of 28 waist jeans for probably the first time since my wedding! Cute Viking salesman #2 came back and said they looked good. When I was hesitant, wondered if I looked like I had squeezed myself into too tight jeans, he asked if I could breath, the important thing, so I could wear them until they relaxed a little. I responded that not only could I breath, I could sit down! Needles to say I bought the jeans, what else was there to do, move into Solo’s dressing room to conduct a torrid affair with a pair of 28-31 Nudie jeans? Better to take them home...

For the next two weeks I wonder if I really am invisible—nobody has said anything about my losing weight. But then I saw Coral, who notices everything. And this week several people noticed. It feels good. Mostly I feel good. I feel like my real body has emerged again.  I like looking in the mirror, running my hands down my sides and feeling the nice inward curve at the waist. Hello old me. I have more energy, am sleeping a little better, am a little more optimistic about life in general. 

Yesterday was my name day. Okay, sort of. It is Amalia, Amelia. And Amy is close enough, say I. So I have celebrated my name day this day since before I even moved here.  I have such fond memories of my first name day. It was my best friend Amy’s and my idea and we planned a splendid program for us and our boyfriends. That was long ago. Our boyfriends our now our husbands and we live on or separate continents. And we miss them oh so much.

After my fave aerobics pass last night I made one of our fave dinners. Then I got presents! Jonathan found The Be Good Tanyas latest CD, Hello Love. I love Stockholm.  I love this CD.  Most of all, I love Jonathan! He's so good to me.

Last Sunday was our first grill outing. I forgot my camera. We met Stacey and Fredrik in the fields at Hökarängen. It was just about a 15 minute bike ride for them and for us, a good meeting place in the middle. Though next time we meet we might choose a more picturesque meeting point a little further off. I didn’t realize that we are so close! Anyway, we had a good, long, lazy Sunday afternoon. We grilled first. Our grilled halloumi sandwiches were most excellent.  It was the first  time I have ever played kubb until the game was really over. They can get long and every time I’ve played it’s been with impatient people and they have quit before finishing, or changed the rules so it is over quicker. It didn’t take too long for Jonathan and Fredrik to beat Stacey and me. But I must say we did hold our own, even were winning for a little while in the middle.  It was record warm that day, like summer, Swedish summer I mean. Härligt.

This week’s weather was not so nice. Not unusual for April. But torture after two summer teasers. Today has brought sunshine and a clear blue sky, if not warmth. We are planning to go to the cherry tree flowering celebration in Kungsträdgården . And I need new earphones for my ipod. And I so need a soy latte...